Something a bit different in your inbox today. I was recently a guest on Phoenix Lessons, a podcast hosted by Amanda Stubbert and Cami Ostman about what it takes to rebuild a life after everything burns down. My episode is called Beyond Belief: Getting Religion Out of My Body, and it’s 51 minutes of conversation I didn’t expect to go quite as deep as it did. (But hey, I’m always here for that!) Near the end, Amanda and Cami asked me a question I still can’t get out of my head. I won’t spoil...
23 days ago • 1 min read
In 2025, I could feel my anxiety increasing. And like that proverbial frog in a pot of water getting hotter, as the year went on it became harder to quit patterns that were actively making things worse. On one hand, I could say my anxiety was about everything happening here in the US, and that would be true. But on the other, it was about how much I was consuming—information, news, stuff—all of which had in common one thing: scrolling on my phone. Basically, I was at the mercy of an algorithm...
2 months ago • 3 min read
I follow Aaron Parnas on Substack, a young independent journalist who's constantly reporting breaking news—usually bad. Except on Sundays when he posts "Good News Only." In my nervous system program, we do something similar. Only we don't limit it to Sundays. Glimmers and Celebrations is how we begin pretty much every meeting or session—private 1:1 coaching, groups, Wednesday Listening and Co-Regulation Labs, Nervous System Playgrounds, masterclasses… This isn't about pretending hard things...
3 months ago • 6 min read
Early in our relationship, my now-husband and I were sitting on his loveseat (I still thought of it that way — haha) in our second-floor apartment in Arlington, Massachusetts, both of us trying hard to be polite, wrapping our defensiveness in civility. (Oof! Can you feel it?) Jeffrey was going through a divorce. I was 47, a new stepmom who was somewhere between still wanting, and grieving not having, a child of my own. Talk about love. And talk about landmines. I don't even remember what the...
5 months ago • 5 min read
In a world that feels increasingly divided, boundaries might sound like more separation. (And if even the word boundary makes you a little “anxy,” as I sometimes call it, I understand.) But what if boundaries are actually what make true and meaningful connection possible?! 😳 Your nervous system is wired for connection, Reader. As mammals, we literally require connection to survive. True fact. And real connection — where you say what you mean, feel at ease being yourself, funny snort-laugh and...
6 months ago • 1 min read
Last Wednesday I was supposed to be on a massage table at 2 o’clock. Instead, I was on my kitchen floor, sobbing. At 1:40, I’d gone to grab my keys from their usual spot — at least, usual when I haven’t left them somewhere else. They weren’t there. What followed was a search that started mildly — checking the jeans I’d worn the day before. Then my jacket. Then under furniture and seat cushions. Then back to the jacket. Then, absurdly, the fridge and freezer, because I’d exhausted all the...
6 months ago • 4 min read
Yesterday, my Instagram algorithm showed me a parade of rapture reels: 📞🐶 the born-again girl calling her atheist friend to ask her to adopt her dog after she got raptured; 🙆🏻♀️🤸🏽♂️ the trainer demo-ing a warm-up sequence to prep your body to be snatched up into the sky (wouldn’t want whiplash!); 👖🙈 the question about whether you’d be raptured clothed or naked, head first or feet first… It felt so good to laugh. These days I have exactly zero fear about the rapture. It wasn’t always like that...
6 months ago • 3 min read
I recently found a picture of myself in a bathing suit as a teenager. Looking into my then-face, I remembered how anxious, depressed and obsessed I was with my weight. I was bulimic and I thought I was too fat. But as I looked at the picture now, all I could think was: what were you thinking? You looked great! A few days later a FB memory popped up, a pic of me sometime in my 40s, a time when I was probably bemoaning the appearance of a chin hair thinking I was soooo old… If this pattern...
7 months ago • 4 min read
In the middle of Whole Foods in Medford, I heard someone call out: “Baba Yaga!” Without hesitation, I turned. Whoever was shouting had to mean me. Sure enough, it was an old classmate from massage school, back when I had a little side hustle making and selling soups and pestos. I called it Baba Yaga’s Kitchen, and soon my classmates stopped asking who this Baba Yaga was who had made their lunch, and just started calling me by her name. Honestly, when I first heard about Baba Yaga I was equal...
7 months ago • 3 min read